Crazy Train

I’ve spoken recently about how odd it feels loving two men.  It’s as if I’m straddling an invisible line between the present and the past.  The stronger my feelings grow for S, the sharper my present (and my future) become, while my past takes on a softer glow, losing definition around the edges. I recently […]

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This Is Me

I’ve been thinking a lot recently about how easily it is to be misjudged.  It’s something I’ve considered often in the past, mainly at a point in my life when I, myself, have been underestimated or presumed to be someone or something I’m not based solely on my appearance or limited interaction with another person. […]

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Loving Two Men

At some point after losing A, when I had begun to consider the possibility of dating again, I started to listen to the stories of others who had traveled that path before me. Some called their next loves their “chapter 2”, but that phrase never sat well with me.  To me, a Chapter 2 would […]

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Deep Impact

My past and present collided this week. Perhaps “collided” is too strong a word, because it implies force or an impact. When I think of a collision, I see destruction and violence. What happened to me wasn’t violent or destructive, but no less powerful. This is a rough time of year for me. Of course […]

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Journey of a Thousand Miles

So, it’s been a few weeks since I packed my car and drove 1,000+ miles to do some more healing, and to rediscover who I am on my own with my husband’s urn and the teddy bear my children gave me last Mother’s Day buckled in the passenger seat. Perhaps it’s actually discovery, rather than rediscovery, […]

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What I Learned at Camp Widow

For those of you who know me, it probably won’t come as a surprise that I identify as being an ambivert. In case you’ve never heard the term before, for me it essentially means that I’m shy until I’m not. This past weekend, I had the incredible opportunity to attend Camp Widow. [If you or […]

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Front Row Seat

In case you don’t know (although I’m fairly certain most of you probably do) Facebook has an “On This Day” function, which basically shows you photos and updates that you’ve posted in previous years on a particular date. Since A passed, this has been one of the things I look forward to most each day. […]

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