It’s that time again. The time when I remind (or inform) you about National Widows Day, which occurs on May 3rd. I don’t post often these days, but I just cannot bring myself to skip this annual post. You would think I make money from it, but no. It has simply made an impact and its purpose stuck with me through these past 7 years.
It was initially created as a reminder for people to remember those who have lost their spouses. There is no “right” way to participate in the day, nor is there a necessity to limit it to only one day. The goal is simple – remind those whose significant others have passed away that they are remembered and loved.
The further one goes from the death of their significant other, they may need less “attention”, for lack of a better word. Some have had their moments, grieving and then getting up to face life head on again. There are those for whom grief is lingering and takes longer than others think “appropriate”. Still, there are others who remain in a sort of grief limbo, afraid to change anything for fear of either forgetting or being judged for moving forward. No matter where a person is on the grief spectrum, its a very individual thing. The one common denominator is that all have been impacted in some way.
Whether those you know are newly widowed or have been without their spouse for years, pop in and say hello, let them know they’re being thought of, do something kind, tell them they are loved. The gesture can be as simple as an “I’m thinking of you” text or as complicated as organizing some time to help with a larger project they seem to be struggling with.
If you are a widow/er yourself and/or the thought of checking in with those like you seems overwhelming, don’t stress about it. Send a text to one or two friends in a similar situation. Or send the same (or similar) message continuously throughout the year as someone crosses your mind. (In fact, this should be the mantra for everyone at all times in any situation. I think it’s a byproduct of my own grief where I will randomly check in with someone I haven’t spoken to in awhile and just say “I miss your face”. )
National Widows Day sort of directs a spotlight on some individuals who might otherwise be avoided; let’s face it, some people don’t know how to handle death of any kind and talking to a person whose long-range life plans have been altered so completely can be a daunting and unpleasant experience. That doesn’t mean it should be dodged, however, because often those are exactly the people who need to hear it the most.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll continue saying it. For all my fellow widows and widowers, you are loved. My inbox is always open, and I’m willing to offer an ear or a shoulder.
Copyright Many Faces of Cheri G 2023