Pardon the Mess

If this is your first visit here, welcome to my crazy.  If you are returning, thank you.  In either case, please share this site with someone who may find some comfort from one who has been there. After the sudden death of my 50 y.o. high-school sweetheart husband from undiagnosed heart disease, I became an […]

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Empty and Fulfilled

The other day I did a thing. It was something that hadn’t even really been on my radar as potentially emotional or difficult. Yet, it turned out to be both, which ultimately threw me a curveball. After much internal debate and occasional discussion with S, we came to the decision that it was time to […]

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International Widows Day 2019

I’ve spoken for a few years now about National Widows Day but I should also acknowledge International Widows Day. Started by the United Nations, June 23rd is meant to raise awareness about the struggles Widows and their families face in countries around the world, especially those in Thors World areas. My late husband, A, passed […]

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National Widows Day 2019

This is the third year in a row I’m speaking about National Widows Day which occurs on May 3rd.  And like last year, I’m trying to give you some advance notice so you can participate. National Widows Day was started by the folks over at Widow Wednesday, an extension of their Widow Wednesdays where they encourage […]

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Letting Go and Losing It a Little

I’ve spoken publicly about loss, grieving, healing, and most recently finding love again after losing my spouse / best friend / partner.  You have learned far too much about not only grief and widowhood, but my private life, as well.  Far.  Too.  Much. However, whenever someone reaches out to me about something they’ve read on […]

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Pain in the Box

[Note: This is not my theory, but it spoke to me and I have taken it one step further.] There has been some recent buzzing online about a woman who shared the analogy her doctor had shared with her about grief.  Essentially, it explains that grief is a ball that resides within a box complete […]

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Crazy Train

I’ve spoken recently about how odd it feels loving two men.  It’s as if I’m straddling an invisible line between the present and the past.  The stronger my feelings grow for S, the sharper my present (and my future) become, while my past takes on a softer glow, losing definition around the edges. I recently […]

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