Ain’t No Sunshine…

Yes.  I sometimes speak of my husband in the present tense.  Often, in fact.  And generally, I don’t even think about it being “wrong” until after the words pass my lips.  Then I have this hyperspeed conversation with myself, essentially going back and forth about what I said, why I said it, who I said […]

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Fighting for Love

A random string of memories popped up today, and not exactly the “best” ones.   I’m not entirely sure why they decided to rear their heads, although possibly, they may have come from hearing Leona Lewis’ Bleeding Love and specifically the lyrics: “Trying hard not to hear, but they talk so loud.   Their piercing sounds […]

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The Heat is On

My A/C is broken. In fact, I’ve had it turned off since Sunday night because it was simply wasting electricity and the house wasn’t any cooler.  It’s Summer in Florida and I’m having to sleep with the windows open and just a ceiling fan running. I bought two floor fans for my two young adult […]

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Wanderlust

Some people wonder how I continue to function after losing the love of my life.  Some marvel at how “strong” I am.  Still others think me to be callous or uncaring in “moving on” so “quickly”.    [Note:  I consider myself to be moving forward, not moving on; the first denotes positive motion while the […]

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My New Sleeping Partner

This Mother’s Day seemed hard, as were the days leading up to it.  Harder than last year, when I think I was still very deep in the numbness following A’s death.  In the initial hours, days and weeks of losing a loved one, there is a sort of blanket of despair that, while heavy and […]

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Lean on Me

My uncle is having open heart surgery today. This is my father’s younger brother and the father of my cousin / maid of honor / honorary nose wiper. Yes, I mean that cousin, the same one who dropped everything and hopped a flight to be by my side when A was in the hospital, despite the […]

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Continued Drought

Since becoming widowed, I have been told, in essence, that the second year of grief is more difficult than the first.  I have heard it said so many times that I felt there must be some truth to it.  I’m only a few weeks into my “Year Two” and probably unqualified to really weigh in […]

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