My world shattered when I became a widow. I am now attempting to reassemble the broken shards into something damaged, fractured, and scarred, yet beautiful.
At some point after losing A, when I had begun to consider the possibility of dating again, I started to listen to the stories of others who had traveled that path before me. Some called their next loves their “chapter 2”, but that phrase never sat well with me. To me, a Chapter 2 would […]
Read More
My past and present collided this week. Perhaps “collided” is too strong a word, because it implies force or an impact. When I think of a collision, I see destruction and violence. What happened to me wasn’t violent or destructive, but no less powerful. This is a rough time of year for me. Of course […]
Read More
Lately, I’ve been discussing dating and relationships at great length with my “uncoupled” friends. I’m purposely choosing a variation of Gwyneth Paltrow’s euphemism on being single because I’ve been talking to both widows and my “normie” divorced friends about the subject, so it’s less a widow thing and more a single woman thing. Dating for […]
Read More
If it seems that I’ve been somewhat MIA here, you’re right. My time is not my own these days and I don’t get many opportunities to sit at my computer and tell you what’s going on with me – I prefer to actually be out there trying to live my life again. Part of that […]
Read More
I looked at myself naked in my bathroom mirror the other day. Really looked at myself. And, in some ways, it’s as if I’m seeing myself for the very first time. Have my boobs always looked like that, or have even they changed since A’s death? They just look different to me somehow. Are they […]
Read More
A random string of memories popped up today, and not exactly the “best” ones. I’m not entirely sure why they decided to rear their heads, although possibly, they may have come from hearing Leona Lewis’ Bleeding Love and specifically the lyrics: “Trying hard not to hear, but they talk so loud. Their piercing sounds […]
Read More
This Mother’s Day seemed hard, as were the days leading up to it. Harder than last year, when I think I was still very deep in the numbness following A’s death. In the initial hours, days and weeks of losing a loved one, there is a sort of blanket of despair that, while heavy and […]
Read More