Empty and Fulfilled

The other day I did a thing. It was something that hadn’t even really been on my radar as potentially emotional or difficult. Yet, it turned out to be both, which ultimately threw me a curveball. After much internal debate and occasional discussion with S, we came to the decision that it was time to […]

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Letting Go and Losing It a Little

I’ve spoken publicly about loss, grieving, healing, and most recently finding love again after losing my spouse / best friend / partner.  You have learned far too much about not only grief and widowhood, but my private life, as well.  Far.  Too.  Much. However, whenever someone reaches out to me about something they’ve read on […]

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Crazy Train

I’ve spoken recently about how odd it feels loving two men.  It’s as if I’m straddling an invisible line between the present and the past.  The stronger my feelings grow for S, the sharper my present (and my future) become, while my past takes on a softer glow, losing definition around the edges. I recently […]

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Loving Two Men

At some point after losing A, when I had begun to consider the possibility of dating again, I started to listen to the stories of others who had traveled that path before me. Some called their next loves their “chapter 2”, but that phrase never sat well with me.  To me, a Chapter 2 would […]

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Deep Impact

My past and present collided this week. Perhaps “collided” is too strong a word, because it implies force or an impact. When I think of a collision, I see destruction and violence. What happened to me wasn’t violent or destructive, but no less powerful. This is a rough time of year for me. Of course […]

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Finding Myself

Lately, I’ve been discussing dating and relationships at great length with my “uncoupled” friends. I’m purposely choosing a variation of Gwyneth Paltrow’s euphemism on being single because I’ve been talking to both widows and my “normie” divorced friends about the subject, so it’s less a widow thing and more a single woman thing. Dating for […]

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