Finding Myself

Lately, I’ve been discussing dating and relationships at great length with my “uncoupled” friends. I’m purposely choosing a variation of Gwyneth Paltrow’s euphemism on being single because I’ve been talking to both widows and my “normie” divorced friends about the subject, so it’s less a widow thing and more a single woman thing. Dating for […]

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Art is Beauty

If it seems that I’ve been somewhat MIA here, you’re right.  My time is not my own these days and I don’t get many opportunities to sit at my computer and tell you what’s going on with me – I prefer to actually be out there trying to live my life again. Part of that […]

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Naked Truth

I looked at myself naked in my bathroom mirror the other day. Really looked at myself. And, in some ways, it’s as if I’m seeing myself for the very first time. Have my boobs always looked like that, or have even they changed since A’s death?  They just look different to me somehow.  Are they […]

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Fighting for Love

A random string of memories popped up today, and not exactly the “best” ones.   I’m not entirely sure why they decided to rear their heads, although possibly, they may have come from hearing Leona Lewis’ Bleeding Love and specifically the lyrics: “Trying hard not to hear, but they talk so loud.   Their piercing sounds […]

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My New Sleeping Partner

This Mother’s Day seemed hard, as were the days leading up to it.  Harder than last year, when I think I was still very deep in the numbness following A’s death.  In the initial hours, days and weeks of losing a loved one, there is a sort of blanket of despair that, while heavy and […]

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Continued Drought

Since becoming widowed, I have been told, in essence, that the second year of grief is more difficult than the first.  I have heard it said so many times that I felt there must be some truth to it.  I’m only a few weeks into my “Year Two” and probably unqualified to really weigh in […]

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Cardinal Song

I’ve spoken on more than one occasion of the importance of music in my relationship with my late husband.  It was an integral part of our family life, and the value and meaning of certain songs and lyrics haven’t stopped simply because he’s not physically here to share the moments with me. There are times […]

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